WHAT IS A PROXIMITY BESTIE?
As I grow older, friendships become harder to maintain and obtain. I have learned that many adult relationships heavily rely on immediate proximity for depth and longevity. Consequently, absence, as a result of distance, does not create fondness but discomfiture (yuck).
PERSONAL EXPERIENCE
My social life took a Ray Lewis hook as I leapt into my 30s. My attempts at Christian circles failed (as hard as they try not to, they tend to feel rather exclusive). I tried to create outside communities, but members of book clubs and running groups had ulterior motives that are of no interest to me (IYKYK).
I am saddened by my new reality, especially as I recall how my gifts once made room for me in those very spaces. Those days are long gone!
WHAT NOW?
It is natural to gravitate to people who are near to us — people who are in similar seasons of life or, similar professions, or who share similar interests. Nearness inevitably factors in why many friendships stand the tests of time. However, it is worth acknowledging that when those friendships are tested by many miles or, a cross-country move, a change in marital status, or maybe new church homes, it hurts!
Are we willing to continue participating in mere proximity friendships? Or are we prepared to do the work for more? What would it look like to build friendships that will last — even when being in close proximity isn’t an option?
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